MightyCornholio's Inner Sanctum

I don’t usually post things of this sort of personal nature, but since there’s absolutely zero chance of either of the other parties reading this (besides which I shall hold back any names to protect, well not innocent but their privacy at least).  Plus, it was so uncanny and unlikely that I’ll share it with you.

This morning I thought I’d been brought onto the film set of my own Romantic Comedy as lo and behold who should get onto my bus into this morning, but my ex-girlfriend and the new man in her life.  Not only were there only two seats left on the bus, but one of them was right next to me, and so he chose to plonk himself down beside me obviously unaware of whom I was.

They then proceeded to have a rather in-depth and frank discussion about their life together across the bus (she was sitting a couple of rows diagonally in front of him).  A million thoughts ran through my head on what I should say and how I should act, as this is the first time I’ve seen her with someone since we broke up - as my good friend Endie pointed out, the whole bursting in on the ex-girlfriend scene whilst she was with Tim Robbins from High Fidelity scene was there to be utilised.

I did at once consider that it might appear gallant of me to offer my seat to her so they can sit together, and rather selfishly then I wouldn’t have to be subjected to their conversation.  However, since she was clearly pretending that I wasn’t there it occurred to me that this would then force her to confirm that I existed and I couldn’t be bothered with such melodramatic consequences at half past eight on a Thursday morning.

After ruminating on this for some time, I then came to the conclusion that it was now a good fifteen minutes since they’d boarded and it’d now look like I was trying too hard.  Gosh darn it, John Cusack would have known what to do.  He would have had some witty repartee to dispense that would have at once dispelled any palpable tension in the air and at the same time made the audience think, “why is she with him, when he’s obviously got so much more to offer; witty, charming, urbane, not immediately handsome, but well turned out.”

As it was, I sat in silence reading my free Metro newspaper, but unable to concentrate on any of the articles contained within.  I then just stared out the window counting down the moments until they’d both disembark from the bus.

I then got off the bus and trudged my way up to work, and considered that perhaps this is the “mini tragedy” part of my Romantic Comedy, part of the protagonists journey that he needs to undergo before he can now meet the kooky girl next door with the dog that wraps the two of us together with its leash accidentally.  Unfortunately, that happened to Endie, but you live in hope.

This weekend I managed to catch up on a few things that have been pestering me for a while, I posted to my blog (which hopefully you are reading right now) and I watched the excellent, but uncomfortable motion picture, The Last King of Scotland.  If you haven't seen it then I can highly recommend it, and for more than just the riveting performance by Forest Whitaker of Idi Amin as a man who was explosive, deeply sadistic, paranoid and yet sometimes utterly charming all in the same kilt-clad countenance.  This led me to wonder whether all dictators were a mass of contradictions, did Stalin have a secret love of landscape gardening to temper his murderous tendencies to the "traitors" he saw at every turn?

Surely of all of the dictators to have come to power, none are as deluded as North Korea's Kim-Jong-Il.   Or to list just some of his 1,200 titles, Leader with Extraordinary Personality, The Sun of Socialism, The Sun of Life, The Eternal Sun, The Sun of the 21st Century, The World's Greatest Writer and Greatest Musical Genius, Supreme Commander at the Forefront of the Struggle Against Imperialism and the United States, Man with Encyclopaedic Knowledge, Heaven-Sent Hero, Guardian Deity of the Planet, Eternal Bosom of Hot Love and, my personal favourite, Master of the Computer who Surprised the World (just what did he surprise us with?).  This is a man who reportedly pilots fighter jets, writes operas, produces films - and is said to have shot 11 holes-in-one during the first round of golf he ever played.  North Korea's media has said the flowers come into bloom when he appears and rainbows fill the sky on his birthday.  I can hardly wait until Sunday's North Korea National Day, when we can get the opportunity to hear another rendition of the mighty tune My Happiness is in the Bosom of the Respected General.

If you have a “favourite”* dictator then please post a comment to let me know with your reasons for choosing?

* “favourite” in a Ricky Gervais, “I’m being sarcastic” way

Anyone else had a crack at a PS3 yet?